Bowing to reality
I took a step toward positive self-esteem this weekend. I bought clothes that fit. Since the failed Zoloft experiment and quitting smoking, I’ve felt horrible about myself, as I’ve expressed here. It’s going to take 3-4 months, maybe more, for the drug weight to come off, so I decided that in the meantime I don’t want to beat myself up because my old things don’t fit. So I bought some a size bigger.
I don’t think of it as giving up. It’s more a matter of being comfortable in my skin until my metabolism straightens out, particularly since I have a conference coming up that I’ve looked forward to for months, and a trip back home that will require all the self-confidence I can muster. For the first time in a long time I looked in the mirror this morning and actually thought, “Wow, I look good.” Not thin by any means, but I think I look nice.
This is such a huge step for me. I know there are people out there who would say that at this weight I don’t deserve to feel good about myself, but I’m trying to ignore that. I know that I’ve got to have a healthy attitude before I can make changes, so I’m starting with this.
The rest will come with time.
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5 Responses to “Bowing to reality”
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Oh hooray for you! I am, you know, one of those who thinks you are beautiful to behold so it’s good now that we’re in agreement about that. Bluegrass Poet(Quote)
You’re biased, but thank you, Poet. :) You made my day. Terry(Quote)
Shalom Terry,
Indeed it will.
B’shalom,
Jeff Jeff Hess(Quote)
Terry, do not think in sizes. Think only in what looks lovely and makes you feel good. I believe Clinton Kelly says something along those lines! (He was at an event here, and I listened with rapt attention.) Size is irrelevant, my dear! I can wear anything between an 8 and a 14 depending on who makes it — and all in the same darn day. :) So, size doesn’t matter. Feeling good and looking fabulous in things that fit — that’s the only thing that matters.
And I am sure, btw, that you look fabulous in your new togs. :) Lynn(Quote)
Thanks, Lynn. I do feel pretty good in them. I’m not used to having new things – generally all my clothes come from the 2nd hand store – so that’s a boost right there. Now I just need to convince myself to wear them, instead of saving them for a special occasion. Terry(Quote)